PEOPLE WHO ARE BLESSINGS ARE TO BE SHARED!

Life is never predictable – no matter how many changes one sees in life – be it in family life, work life or in ministry. In fact over the past 4 years, there were so many changes compared to the earlier 4 years In this retreat centre, there were times, I wished things could remain the same. I have never felt that more than in late September 2012, when I heard that the Asst. Director of our retreat centre, Rev. Fr. Michael Payyapilly V.C., was being posted to Sydney, Australia to set up a new retreat centre.

“I was chosen and sent to help the faith of God’s chosen people and to lead them

to the truth taught by our religion…”

(Titus:1:1)

Fr. Michael Payyapilly V.C.

The first question I thought of was, “God, why does it have to be Fr. Michael whom you take from us here?” The second was the joy I felt for the great blessing and opportunity for Fr. Michael to begin the Divine mission in Australia! I remember sitting in my office for a few confused moments – not knowing what to feel. It is never easy to hear someone who is so loved by all of us in this retreat centre to be leaving our Divine Family. Fr. Michael came to Divine in early December 2006 - just before his priestly ordination on 31 December 2006. I was really busy on a book project but I heard snippets of someone with a booming voice preaching so eloquently as I used to be rushing back and forth from the Divine Printers office. It made me really curious as to who was the person behind this inspired preaching? I was completely taken aback to see it was this really young looking slim “kid”. I asked around and was told he was a deacon. Even then, I remember distinctly telling our director, Rev. Fr. Augustine Vallooran V.C, one day very shortly after, “Father, like Simeon, I can tell you that I have heard your successor. Please bring this new deacon back to Divine when he is ordained.” Fr. Augustine sat back and laughed heartily! Thankfully, that Is exactly what happened and Fr. Michael joined Divine Retreat Centre in March 2007.  It is the greatest blessing and gift God gave to Divine Retreat Centre in the 8 ½ years I have been here!

 From the very first, all of us were in awe - it seemed like this ridiculously young-looking priest sounded as wise as old Moses probably was! How can it be? That was all we were asking each other. We saw the same stunned reaction from all the retreatants.  I know how many times I felt my heart being pierced by the impassioned preaching of Fr. Michael and being moved to tears so MANY times over the course of these 6 years during Father’s Holy Masses, Physical Healing sessions, Inner Healing sessions and during the year-end Thanksgiving Adoration services. It was never-one off and it was not just me. The retreatants and lay volunteers were always so touched by Fr. Michael’s priestly ministry. What was it though that so touched all of us?

There is only ONE answer. In Fr. Michael, we see clearly a person who LOVES Jesus above everything and everyone else – not a SINGLE person can doubt that!  The passion and the love for Christ can be heard in Fr. Michael’s voice and seen in every moment he carries out his ministry.  Fr. Michael is really loved by all of us – not because he ever went out of his way to be popular. It was quite the opposite in fact.  I do not think Fr. Michael cared even a little if we liked him or not – he was just so focused on proclaiming Jesus and being a holy priest. Fr. Michael is one person who has never sought the limelight. A fact, Father himself admitted during his farewell speech to us.  We never ever saw him onstage during any major Divine celebration events! I used to wonder where Fr. Michael was. Often I would see him for a few minutes at the very back – where we, the volunteers would sit. We never ever saw other priests seated there with us! That really touched the hearts of all of us who serve here. This was true Christ-like humility! He was not in the least interested in recognition and applause. Fr. Michael was only on stage if he was preaching the Word of God. I always remember this words In my heart whenever I see Fr. Michael – “More of you, Lord, and less of me.” That is the MAIN lesson I have learnt from Fr. Michael. He is a beautiful example of servant leadership. A tireless and zealous priest who lives for God! Nothing and no one but Jesus!

Off the stage, Fr. Michael is not seen around much. He is very soft-spoken and seems quite an introvert usually. One thing truly stood out – Fr. Michael is a priest of deep prayers with a tremendous love of the Holy Eucharist and a devotion to Mother Mary. He lives God’s Word. There was never any partiality to a single person. He was fair, firm and loving to all of us. What I admired most personally in Fr. Michael was this – he was very upfront if I needed to be corrected but he never kept it in his heart against me! I appreciated that he would address the issue to me directly and not just keep silent. He always heard me out if I wanted to speak up too. I never ever heard Fr. Michael say, “All the others are saying…" There was never these general statements where I could never even know in what context or why it was said…after all, how can any person respond to that?  There are always two sides to a situation and in Fr. Michael, most of us found a person who did just that! He will always listen to both sides and he would pray and make a decision. It did not matter who were involved. All of us know Fr. Michael is a very fair person – a person of great discernment.  It Is the one comment I heard from nearly all the volunteers who shared with me especially when news of Fr. Michael’s Australia posting was known.  To earn this respect in such a big community here is really an achievement! It is this very quality that makes Fr. Michael so greatly loved by all of us who serve here. He is known as being a very frank, upfront person and yet a very merciful, loving and impartial priest.

Fr. Michael praying over my Mum during Anointing Service in Holy Week 2008

Living in a community, no one can live here without some sparks flying because of problems or misunderstandings. I had my fair share with Fr. Michael too. Neither of us are easy going persons. I think one of the traits we do share is we are quite intense in our personality. Yet what I always remember is the kindness, priestly love and concern that Fr. Michael has always shown me in the time we have known each other. When I heard about the death of my father in 2007, I had known Fr. Michael for only a few months. Yet in a heavy storm, he came to see me as I was packing my bags to catch a flight home. My father had passed away on my birthday and as I sat and just chatted with Fr. Michael about my dad, about an hour before I had to catch my flight, I truly felt the comforting Love of Jesus. I have never forgotten that act of love by Fr. Michael – of reaching out to me in such a personal way. I needed that. He was equally so kind and open-hearted when my mother came to spend two months with me in India a few months later – always warmly speaking to her every day even if she at times asked him the same questions again! She absolutely loves Fr. Michael and I was very grateful that he made her feel so at home in Divine by his thoughtfulness and friendliness.

There have been numerous instances of this deep thoughtfulness of Fr. Michael. He also appreciated each of us and showed it clearly in his quiet and genuine way. Many of us remember the time Fr. Michael called all of us volunteers to the front of the retreat hall on the last day of a Konkani convention a few years ago - towards the end of the Anointing service. He insisted, when those of us who were not from the Konkani section just remained standing at the back because we were not part of the Konkani retreat team, to come forward. And then Fr. Michael asked all the retreatants to raise their hands upon us and he prayed for us. It was such a beautiful prayer that EVERY ONE of us volunteers openly cried – the male and female volunteers! We could not help ourselves. For many of us, it is the first time in our ministry, we were being thanked openly with so much love in prayer. There was a tremendous healing in our hearts that day for many of us volunteers. There are hurts and pain even when serving in ministry. In that ONE loving act of prayer, Fr. Michael showed beyond a doubt his compassion and love for all the Divine volunteers – not just those in his team – but for everyone who serves in this retreat centre.

Fr. Michael Payyapilly V.C. (left) and Fr. Augustine Vallooran  V.C. (right)

Fr. Michael is now blessed with a great mission to be the 1^st Director of Divine Retreat Centre Sydney, Broken Bay Diocese, Australia. As Fr. Augustine shared at the farewell gathering, it is with great joy and pride the Vincentian Congregation of India are sending Fr. Michael to be the pioneer of the Divine-Potta retreat ministry in Australia…in a another Continent!

We will all miss Fr. Michael. I felt really emotional at the farewell get-together a few days ago  (19 February 2013) as we have all lived together as a close-knit Divine Family for 6 years – and a most precious person in our midst is moving on.  Yet as I struggled with tears, I felt the same great joy as when I heard the news the first time - of the great grace, honour and blessing God has bestowed upon Fr. Michael. In his young priesthood, he is to pioneer the Divine-Potta mission by setting up the new retreat centre. Like St. Paul, Fr. Michael Is sent forth to renew, reignite and inflame thousands of hearts with the Power of God’s Spirit in Australia and from around the world! There is no doubt – we cannot wait to see the fruit of Fr. Michael’s Divine mission taking shape in Australia.

One thing we are certain - Fr. Michael will NEVER rest until the WHOLE world knows Jesus! So just as this post is dedicated to Fr. Michael for being such a personal inspiration to us in the Divine Retreat Centre, this song, “UNTIL THE WHOLE WORLD HEARS” by Casting Crowns, is definitely all about the one desire in his life!

I am quite sure Fr. Michael is squirming at what I have written so openly in this blog post but Fr.Michael is a great blessing when he was with us and will now be in Sydney, Australia – a shining light of the Divine-Potta ministry… 

God bless and protect you always, Fr. Michael! Our prayers will always be with you!

“My deep desire and hope is that I shall never fail in my duty, but that at all times, and especially just now, I shall be full of courage, so that with my whole being, I shall bring honour to Christ, whether I live or die.”

(Philippians 2:20)

MAKE IT THY BUSINESS TO KNOW THYSELF...- Miguel de Cervantes

Exactly one week into the New Year and I honestly felt like I wanted to be back in 2012 again. So it has been an unsettling few weeks so far. Yet I felt God truly very close to me these past two days - and I feel His Love leading me to "know myself" so that I can  learn to live for Him. To really know myself, I must start  by first emptying myself. I must have the courage and the will to change myself first. I must be willing to accept It is also not about how others see me because that means I am looking to conform to the standards of the world. That is not too difficult because I can just do what pleases others to fit in. For me to live a life pleasing to God, I need to understand in the innermost part my heart, "How should I live so that others can experience Christ through me - my life and whatever I do? The only way I can fully answer and live God's Call is to "know myself fully" from God's perspective.  I have been praying and trying to learn true humility but as each year goes by, I realize that true humility seems elusive to me. Perhaps it will always be for me in my lifetime - yet I have faith that God will not give up on me.  I will continue to strive so that one day I can truly be able to answer the call God has placed in my heart.  

On Tuesday night (22Jan), during Holy Mass when the priest asked us to "paste" our whole life onto the host of bread each of us were holding and praying  before the Consecration of the Eucharist, I suddenly felt this powerful surge of "knowledge" flow from deep within my heart to my brain and onto the host! I no longer felt lost, confused and afraid. From deep within, I knew Jesus would help me to truly understand myself - to give me the strength to keep trying and to change where I needed to. I had often heard this words echoing in my heart ' "Don't give up, Susan." I know that God's Grace in us can help each of us to achieve amazing things in His Name. I remembered a book I absolutely loved reading and had re-read over and over and over again (before I returned it to the priest I borrowed it from a year later!) - Philp Yancey's book  titled "What's So Amazing About Grace?" There are very few writers who have truly touched my heart as Philip Yancey did writing about God's Grace. It gave me REAL hope because I know I am far from being a saint! I struggle often internally if I am worthy to serve in fulltime ministry - about what exactly is my call? But in this book,  the Word of God "My grace is all you need, for my power is greatest when you are weak" (1 Corinthians 9:16) seem to be the main Promise of God to all of us! Yancey explores grace through real-life people who exemplified by their actions and their life, the life-transforming power of Grace in our world.

God's Grace is unmerited but if I am willing to open my heart and my life, God will pour His abundant grace into me so that I can be a blessing to others - no matter what trials or circumstances I face in life; no matter the mistakes I make in life over and over again - God will not give up on me or you or anyone else for that matter! The only question is am I willing to be the clay in God's Hands?  Will I have the humility to learn the 'REAL LESSON" of knowing myself as I am in God's eyes? Can I truly reach out to others empowered By God's Grace?

The months and years ahead are not going to be easy  - I need to learn the most difficult lesson in my life - "to know myself". The YouTube music video, "Grace" by Laura Story, which a friend shared in Facebook really captured a true snapshot of my life's journey with God. The lyrics of the song are also given below the video. 

GRACE (By Laura Story)

My heart is so proud. My mind is so unfocused.
I see the things You do through me as great things I have done.

And now You gently break me, then lovingly You take me

And hold me as my Father and mould me as my Maker.

[Chorus:]

I ask You: "How many times will You pick me up, 

When I keep on letting You down?

And each time I will fall short of Your Glory, 

How far will forgiveness abound?"

And You answer: " My child, I love you.

And as long as you're seeking My face, 

You'll walk in the power of My daily sufficient grace."

At times I may grow weak and feel a bit discouraged, 

Knowing that someone, somewhere could do a better job.

For who am I to serve You? I know I don't deserve You.

And that's the part that burns in my heart and keeps me hanging on.

[Chorus:]

I ask You: "How many times will You pick me up, 

When I keep on letting You down?

And each time I will fall short of Your Glory, 

How far will forgiveness abound?"

And You answer: " My child, I love you.

And as long as you're seeking My face, 

You'll walk in the power of My daily sufficient grace."

You are so patient with me, Lord.

As I walk with You, I'm learning what Your Grace really means.

The price that I could never pay was paid at Calvary.

So, instead of trying to repay You, I'm learning to simply obey You

By giving up my life to You for all that You've given to me.

[Chorus:]

I ask You: "How many times will You pick me up, 

When I keep on letting You down?

And each time I will fall short of Your Glory, 

How far will forgiveness abound?"

And You answer: " My child, I love you.

And as long as you're seeking My face, 

You'll walk in the power of My daily sufficient grace."

"Make it thy business to know thyself, which is the most difficult lesson in the world"

Miguel de Cervantes

NEW BEGINNINGS

The years will never take away 

our chance to start anew

It's only the beginning now

So dreams can still come true

-Gertrude B. McClain-

A caterpillar has to go through the pupa stage to become a butterfly - it has to really struggle out of its cocoon to be the beautiful butterfly that brings colour and joy into the world! As a child, I loved seeing the colourful butterflies fluttering from flower to flower in our garden and then seem to dance in the bright sunshine. I would feel such light joy in my heart.  Today, I also realized that is how it is in life. We must remember we can be "butterflies" in different places and try to bring joy to others.

We must know when it is time to move on and make a new beginning because remaining stagnant can be detrimental to our own self-worth and growth. We may think we are contributing in a meaningful way but that may not be so to those in authority or we could be doing something out of a sense of responsibility but forgetting we must truly follow our heart! 

I met a beautiful young woman a couple of days back who had taken 5 months off to travel in India to find herself and what would make her happy in her life. It made me remember the times in my life when I had the great self-confidence to do just that. Perhaps age tends to make us settle for the safe and the tried and to live in our comfort zone and not be quite so daring about taking risks.

Well, even comfort zones can feel like a combat zone suddenly.  Hence, our heart and mind must be prepared when life has to be a new beginning so that we can try anew to be blessings to others. God has said, “I will never leave you; I will never abandon you.” Let us then be bold and say. “The Lord is my helper, I will not be afraid.’” (Hebrews 13:5-6)

Writing this post reminds me of a dear friend who for the longest while is trying to discern regarding her career's direction and to answer God's Call in a deeper way. I truly hope 2013 will be for her a new joyous challenge to whatever it may be - and for many of us!

It is hard to go through change. I used to cry before each new posting to a different country  about a month or two  before I had to make the move...well, because there was always so many good friends and beautiful memories in each place I had to leave behind to start anew. Yet, on the day I had to leave, I was always very calm and collected while it was my close friend who would shed a few tears amidst the hugs and kisses. I am not sure why - perhaps because I had already cried all my tears out and usually said my goodbyes to most loved ones at home not at the airport. Most of the countries I moved to were a not a problem to live in. I loved what I did and there were always good friends  to uplift and encourage me. I still keep in touch with these friends who are priceless to me!

Well, God will not make us go through the painful "pupa" stage for nothing. For out of pain, has often come the greatest artistic, creative and human achievements in man's history. It helps each of us to take a look at ourselves - how we really are to others. Then, we have to decide once and for all - are we ready for a fresh new beginning to start from scratch - with no regrets of the past? Are we ready to aim for the stars once again?

The deeply reflective YouTube video above, NEW BEGINNINGS by Gertrude B McClain, adapted from "It Is Time For A Fresh Start" is truly worth spending a few contemplative moments as we start 2013. 

“We know that in all things God works for good with those who love him.”

(Romans 8:28)

SO THIS IS CHRISTMAS...

Christmas is just a few days away...I have not really got into the Christmas joyful mood just yet as it has been a really busy period of just trying to finish work before the Christmas Vigil Mass.

But at this moment, I decided to put aside all the work for my heart and mind to have a few silent moments to ponder over what Christmas this year means to me. It is my 9th consecutive Christmas away from loved ones back home. It is a very long time to be away from the love and joy of the Christmas tradition that I grew up with. More than any time of the year, Christmas  is a season I have always absolutely loved as it meant being together with family and great friends - celebrating the Christmas Vigil Mass,  to share hugs and kisses, good food, great cheer, presents and just feeling all the "love" that is in the air! 

So what is Christmas? Some friends have asked me before how I could give up all that I am used to especially during Christmas. I have often asked myself that very same question. The answer is best expressed by the beautiful Christmas song  in the YouTube Music video above - "THIS IS CHRISTMAS" by KUTLESS.

Christmas is all about Christ.  There is much to do to share and celebrate the Christmas joy with Divine's Family - here, across India and all over the world. It is a time to remember in a very special way the love and support of so many hardworking and generous people who remember our Divine mission's urgent charitable and evangelization needs - and they quietly and lovingly are our financial and spiritual partners  to proclaim the Good News everyday - not just in words but by their loving generosity. 

Being a part of the Divine mission, we all try, with God's grace, to make Christmas a very special and holy celebration of Joy - a Divine Christmas is always all about Christ! So it is not that I love my friends and family less - it is about helping to bring Christ's message of Love and Joy to our Divine Family of 3000 members who include the residents of all our charitable homes and the VC priests and fulltime volunteers and to ALL our Divine Family members across the world. 

Every year we visit many of the Divine Homes during Christmas and there is such expectant joy from everyone - the 300 orphan children of our De Paul Home for Boys and Samaritan Home for Girls, the De Paul school, the 600 mentally ill patients of Divine Care Centre , the 100 elderly women in Mari Santhi Bhavan , and the 100 residents of St. Vincent's AIDS Home. Just seeing that few moments of joy and laughter on their faces makes the sacrifice of being away from my loved ones worth it. We are all blessed with love and the security of enjoying Christmas as we wish. But for our less advantaged Divine Family members, it our own little actions here that can bring a special  little extra festive joy to their lives. For me, it is a little act of love - of bringing Christ to them. There are also people from all over India and overseas who come to spend Christmas with Jesus attending a Divine retreat. Every Christmas here is always a special holy, joyful and spiritual experience! The Christmas Vigil Mass always fills me with such hope and joy for the future. That is the true message of Jesus - He is our Lord of Love, Hope, Joy & Peace - He is not about fear and retribution.

Friends of Divine Singapore

Just last week, I had a group of friends from Singapore who were here for the Advent retreat. As we visited the Homes,  the joy they brought to the children and the residents of the other Homes was so heart-touching. The kids loved their wonderful rendition of one of my favourite songs - "This Little Light of Mine". I was not feeling too well that day but even I felt the great joy in my heart seeing Christ in their smiles, their singing, their spontaneous interactions and all the clapping to the songs at every Home we visited. The joyous "Jingle Bells" that all the schoolchildren sang along with them was the best rendition I have heard in the longest while! The Christmas goodies capped a great afternoon! They were Christ's Light - and their little lights shone and lifted up so many. To the Friends of Divine Singapore group (you know who you are) - may the joy you experienced in the Divine retreat and the joy you brought to our Divine Homes be a  special memory we will all always treasure - the bonding of Divine family ties!

Divine's De Paul school children singing along to Jingle Bells!

For Christmas is all about Christ and our family. As we strive to live for Christ, our hearts must be big enough to love beyond our "nuclear" or "blood-ties" family to include God's Family - especially those in need and to make the Good News known to every one.  There could be an elderly couple near you who could be spending Christmas all alone. Why not surprise them with a visit and some Christmas goodies or invite them over for a meal?  We are all one family in the eyes of God.

My Christmas wish for all my friends and loved ones is that Christmas will not just be a one-day festive celebration but a permanent state of our heart to love others and to express that love by our thoughts, words and deeds all the year through... 

ADVENT: BEGINNING ANEW TO RECEIVE THE GRACE OF GOD

It seems hard to believe that 2012 is coming to an end. Christmas is once again around the corner. 336 days have gone by which means 8064 hours or 483,840 minutes of our lives on earth in 2012 have gone by and we can never claim it back! I had a lot of time to think about time passing by recently as I was hospitalized and strictly watched by the nurses about following the doctor’s order of complete bed-rest. In fact, even now as I prepare this post, I am “resting” in bed except for a few hours daily which the doctor agreed with firm conditions. Time keeps passing by and I have had a lot of time to pray and reflect AND to discern how I should live and serve Christ in the upcoming New Year. Yes, God definitely raises the spiritual bar each year lest I get too complacent or indifferent. Not just through what works I do in my ministry – but also in all the moments of my daily ordinary life. I am sure God will do so for each of us.

December is usually one of my busy months and here I am being told to slow down! But I realized, now that I am happily back in Divine, that regardless of all the anxiety I felt being alone in a hospital room 3 hours away from everyone I knew in India and the difficulty of communicating in English properly - I felt the Presence and Grace of God closer to me than I ever had experienced before. During the Homily of the Holy Mass celebration the night before I went to the hospital, these words had struck my heart particularly.  The priest preached in a booming voice, “God is saying, ‘You are precious to Me! (Isaiah 43:4) Yes, you! Every tear you have shed has been counted and collected (Psalm 56:8) and every hair on your head I have counted (Matthew 10:30). It is I who formed you in your mother’s womb (Psalm 139:15) and I have a special mission for you on this earth. I am not FINISHED with you!” I seemed to have been ill since early September (for different reasons) and these words brought a hopeful stirring in my heart that night (20 Nov)...that God is not done with me serving Him yet! The next day what I thought was an outpatient appointment unexpectedly became an immediate 6-day hospital stay! I even had to shop for everything I needed after being admitted.

All I could think of was all my pending work and projects and if this meant I should think of moving back where I feel comfortable - with doctors, the medical system I am familiar with and most of all closer to loved ones. For the first time, I was rather anxious of my health which I tend to take for granted. Well, hospitals and needles are way, way down on my favourites list! Hence – the 6 days made me once again to ponder about life. As the minutes ticked by, I realized how important each moment is for me to use it to share whatever graces God is pouring into my life. 

I only had my Bible, my prayer journal, the Way of The Cross Booklet written by Fr. Augustine Vallooran V.C. (Director of this retreat centre I serve in) and the incredibly inspiring business leadership book “The Pope & The CEO” written by Andreas Widmar of what he learnt from Blessed Pope John Paul II which I was reading for the second time. I never felt lonely even for a moment with these books. All the inspiration and courage I needed came through the words written or jotted down in these books. Most of all, I truly realized that with Advent about to begin, I had this GREAT opportunity to prepare for a NEW BEGINNING – a whole new start with the arrival of Jesus – our Emmanuel (God-with-us) this Christmas!

The night before my operation, as I prayed the Way of the Cross, each Station’s reflection made me to once again to look at my own life. The past few Good Fridays in Divine Retreat Centre, I had wept at some of the reflections which brought back deeply buried (and I thought long-forgotten) experiences in my life. Now I knew as I prayed that Jesus was with me then – IS ALWAYS with me - at all times. He would have come down to earth to die – even if it was only to save me – ONE sinner.That is the amazing love of Jesus! I felt so precious; I also felt truly loved as a person. Jesus had shown me the incredibly supportive love of my close friends in Singapore - the JOY Family (I have no words to describe of their prayers and love), my brother - George who being a pharmacist explained the medications and kept daily tabs of my health, Fr. Augustine Vallooran – whose calm, assuring voice took away whatever anxieties I had and who made all the needed arrangements, and other very dear priests in India and friends overseas who called, wrote and prayed so lovingly for me when they heard of my hospitalization.

I guess some of us need sometimes a life-incident to stop us and to experience in our own lives that God loves us- that each of us IS precious as an INDIVIDUAL - and that we are loved by family and friends even if we all live in distant countries. I had chosen not to worry most of my family members just because my immune system had taken an extended holiday and my body was under some stress.

I do not want to waste any more moments in my life when I can share the Grace of God in me with every person God sends into my life. I want this Christmas to be a new beginning in my life for my Saviour. The book “The Pope & The CEO” that I am re-reading slowly and reflecting of Pope John Paul II is truly inspiring about how to live our Catholic faith so that it is a LIVING faith at all times – work, ministry, friends and family life. Well, I may not be leading any teams now but that does not mean my life cannot be an example to others. As followers of Christ, each of us must be a leader to inspire others by our “authentic Christ-centred living”.  I need to make sure that the people in my life feel personally valued and cared for – never ASSUMING that they should know! Pope John Paul II had this amazing gift. It is about always putting people first as Jesus does; nurturing, listening, acknowledging, loving, trusting and building up their talents and skills and their faith. That moment when a person needs my time or attention to experience God’s Grace will never come back again. I might not get another chance to show them they do matter to me. It is not easy but I am determined to try to live as Blessed Pope John Paul II who has always personally inspired me since a youth.  Nothing is impossible for God. Each of us – you and me - can be a “shining light” of Christ’s Love & Joy to others. Compassion, joy, caring, listening, acceptance, acknowledgment, understanding, trust and humility have no material value but infinite “Divine Value” to the person who may need it most from us even without our knowledge. That always touches and convert hearts more than correction, judgments, human logic or rules ever do. If change is needed, I have learnt one sure fact in Divine – TAKE IT UP TO GOD IN PRAYER! He will do the needed or show His Way at the right time.

 So as I meditate in prayer this Holy Season of Advent on the life of Jesus in the Way of The Cross and in my daily bible reflections, I lift up all my loved ones, friends, persons I find difficult to deal with, readers of my blog, my Divine Family, along with my own life to God….that with His Gift of His Precious Son - Jesus our Emmanuel – a new JOYFUL BEGINNING in life awaits each of us this blessed season of Christmas and for the rest of our lives!

I would like to share with you the soul-inspiring YouTube music video below - "AMAZING GRACE (MY CHAINS ARE GONE)" by CHRIS TOMLIN.

May our hearts be prepared anew to receive unconditionally the ultimate Grace of God – our Messiah and King!

“Come, Lord Jesus!” 

(Revelation 22:20)

BE INSPIRED DAILY...WHEREVER YOU ARE!

I have 2 questions to ask - "Do you remember what you thought and felt when you first woke up today? And as the day went by, what are the moments and thoughts you can still remember?" Well, my hope is that the it was good and hopeful moments that you recall. During my recent vacation back to Singapore/Malaysia, I was thinking about the many different people I have met in my life - and why I still remember them! I realized one fact - we leave an imprint on others just as they do on us. The question is what kind of lasting impression are we giving?

Some things remain the same regardless if one is working in the secular world or serving in a ministry. Firstly, we are all humans and secondly our outlook on life is based on our upbringing, our character and our attitude to life. 

As I was reflecting on what is it in others that draws me to them, I realized it is that they make me feel good about life and most of all they inspire me! They have the instrinsic faith that each of us can do something to make our families, our workplace, our church, our world a better place. It is getting up each day with an inner joy and hope to seize the day - Carpe Diem! One of my most favourite bible verses is 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 -  "Be joyful always, pray at all times, be thankful in all circumstances. This is what God wants from you in your life in union with Christ Jesus."  I have spent much time reflecting on this verse the past few years and I know personally how true this Word of God has been for me.

For me, it has helped at how I look and observe all that is happening around me - especially people. Perhaps that is why I can write about events in my life since much time is spent reflecting and praying  over incidents  that capture my heart - "Why is it so? What can be different? What can/should I do?" At times, all I can do is pray!

There are some people who at times frustrate me. They will continuously complain about every one and everything around them. They cannot see the good but only the bad. I used to keep quiet even when I did not like hearing it - because it troubles me to hear negative things! Well recently, I decided to follow some wise advice a priest gave me before I started my piligrimage to the Holy Land in 2009. I had spoken about how I get troubled just listening and it affects me. The answer was simply to tell whoever it was not to do so.  Well. that is easier said than done! The few times I tried before resulted in the person being insulted when I merely said instead of always complaining, one should act to change it if possible or keep quiet and live with it.

Well, I decided on this vacation, that I was going to do so for the rest of my life.  I have done so upon my return to India and I intend to stick to my decision. I am going to look at each person and be inspired daily by what good they do - not necessarily to me personally - but for the good of others for the Glory of God! I started trying to do so consciously about two years ago. It was not easy with those who I may have had problems with before. But Bl. Mother Teresa's words (which I first read in 2011) inspire me whenever I fall off the track. Mother Teresa said, "We need lots of love to forgive; lots of humility to forget. It is not complete forgiveness if we do not forget also." Well, there is no way I am going to get into Heaven if I have unforgiveness - even if it is towards ONE person! It is definitely not easy but I am trying!

Max and his grandmother - my Mum!

The person who most inspired me on my recent vacation (and I met so many loved ones who inspire me!) is someone most  people would not normally consider a model of inspiration. It is my "special-needs" nephew who is in his thirties now. So many his age are now enjoying great success in their professional lives  and achieving their dreams. This is not what is in store for my nephew, Max. His will be a "divine" reward in Heaven. Yet, it is Max, who most inspired me. Why? The main reason is that he is a person who is usually filled with joy - most of the time! He is very helpful! When we were in Penang, Malaysia with my Mum, none of us had to worry about my Mum who had to use a wheelchair as she could not walk for more than 300 metres without tiring. Max would be the first to want help her into it and push her around. Admittedly sometimes it seemed as if he was in a F1 wheelchair race and had to be asked to slow down! Yet, Max was totally considerate towards his grandmother and my Mum was very happy and touched by his love. That is how Max always is. He was the same with my late father. He is always opening doors and holding lifts for others...something many so-called "normal" people will not do.

Back in Singapore, Max is actively involved in a few church ministries: ALPHA Ministry, FAITH & LIGHT, and the St. Damien's Society. He is very outgoing and seemed to know many parishioners. At ALPHA, he helps set up the seating arrangements and in the weekly registration. On the recent Mission Sunday, when I got to the church, he was at the main entrance selling muffins for the St. Damien Society to raise funds for children in an orphanage in Batam Island, Indonesia. Max was doing so for all the morning masses that day. Last week, he had his school Flag Day to raise funds for the TOUCH Community School. His Mum (my sister) told me his tin was practically full while hers and others were barely a quarter full. Max with his friendly nature and enthusiasm touched the hearts of people to donate!

If we truly looked with the "eyes of love", like Jesus, we will be inspired daily...wherever we are! But it is not enough to be inspired, we must make a decision and do it. More importantly, to do it with all our heart, our mind and our soul!  We will see Jesus in others  and in all that is happening around us and in this world. God will give us the capacity to love unlimitedly! I am quite puzzled when I hear some people say they are taking an extended break from church ministry and then return sometime later. Often, it is just one night a week. We spend the whole week at work where God is blessing us and our family and yet an evening seems too much to serve for God. When we serve God, we must be fully committed as we are to our career. We must be willing to set aside a time to bring others to God. What each of us need is to be inspired each day, then we will never feel tired or stressed. I was struck when I first heard our Director preach this fact during the weekly Divine retreat. Father said, "We are stressed when our hearts are not in union with God. That is when we feel tired and stressed." How very true it is! I have found that because I make sure to have personal time to pray and meditate daily and to be part of the daily Holy Mass celebration - no matter how busy I am, Jesus is in my heart to inspire me. I am never alone! Even when I feel down and tired, somehow I will be lifted up by a Word of God from the Bible, a homily, through the words of a friend or just through an email.

When each of us live our daily ordinary lives, wherever we are, with personal inspiration to be "Christ's Light to the world" (Matthew 5:14) and "Salt of the earth" (Matthew 5:13), there is nothing we cannot achieve for the Glory of God! 

I dedicate this post to my nephew, Max, and to all the many special-needs people who I have met in my life. They have truly touched my heart with their love, their warmth and their ability  to reach out and inspire their families and loved ones by their daily life! May God's Blessings and Protection be upon all of them every moment of their lives.

Below is an uplifting YouTube Video "Inspirations 365 Days A Year" based on a same-titled book by Zig Ziglar.  May your heart be inspired!

"What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what 

you become by achieving your goals."

Zig Ziglar

TO BE AND NOT TO DO...

It was Mission Sunday two days ago and it was a blessed day! The Holy Mass at Blessed Sacrament Church in Singapore was a beautiful and holy experience. As the parish priest, Rev. Fr. Anthony Hutjes SS.CC, shared at the start, this particular mass showed what "mission" meant - the main celebrant was a visiting priest from Uganda, Fr. Anthony himself was originally from Holland, the priest sharing the Mission Sunday Homily was Rev. Fr. Christopher Soh S.J., a Singaporean Jesuit priest from the neighbouring St. Ignatius parish and the couple who were to do the Mass Offering of Bread and Wine were Filipinos. Indeed, as I looked around the packed church, it was a joy to see people of so many nationalities and races present! And I thanked God for all the missionaries before who have made Jesus known to so many people all over the world - including to my ancestors who originated from India.

I had also been pondering on the Year of Faith which began on 11 October 2012 and will continue until 24 November 2013. During this special year, our Holy Father will reflect on the New Evangelization.  Pope Benedict XVI has called upon all Catholics to strengthen our faith and lead by example.

I have been greatly uplifted on this vacation break to be able to listen to so many of my friends on how they are living out the mission God has placed in their lives despite difficult personal trials. There is a confidence and a sense of "deep inner conviction" that I can see in them that was not so visible before. As we shared joyfully some of the lessons we are learning from God, we realized how "personal" Jesus is with each of us - to help us on our personal mission on earth. That is not just an "exclusive privilege" for a select few. God is doing it for each of us as we willingly try our best to totally surrender our hearts to Him. 

Often God is hearing our prayers and granting our petitions but we may not like the "package" through which God answers our prayers. But over time, God's Plan becomes clear and we realize that our human intellect could not fully comprehend God's infinite wisdom. The YouTube music video "HOLDING NOTHING BACK" by Jesus Culture at the top of this blog is all we need to be. Yet it is not easy (for me!) to surrender totally to God. It means having give up every bit of my own self-ego and self-will. It is something I still have to pray each day to overcome and to be able to discern and humbly do God's Will in obedience and patience.

So what special things can I do for Jesus in this Year of Faith? I realized it was very simple and abundantly clear in the hymn that was  beautifully sung  by the  Blessed Sacrament church choir during Holy Communion on Mission Sunday. My heart was moved and touched deeply as I just experienced the meaningful lyrics in my heart. I did not sing the hymn - I just knelt and in the stillness of my heart, I made it my prayer to God for the rest of my life. I do not have to plan to do special things to show my faith to God. I just need this one VERY special grace which is always a personal struggle for me...and it is so touchingly  sung in the YouTube hymn below -  "MAKE ME A SERVANT" by the Maranatha Singers.

"How happy are those servants whose  master finds them awake and ready when he returns! I tell you, he will take out his coat, have them sit down, 

and will wait on them."

(Luke 12:37)