ADVENT: BEGINNING ANEW TO RECEIVE THE GRACE OF GOD

It seems hard to believe that 2012 is coming to an end. Christmas is once again around the corner. 336 days have gone by which means 8064 hours or 483,840 minutes of our lives on earth in 2012 have gone by and we can never claim it back! I had a lot of time to think about time passing by recently as I was hospitalized and strictly watched by the nurses about following the doctor’s order of complete bed-rest. In fact, even now as I prepare this post, I am “resting” in bed except for a few hours daily which the doctor agreed with firm conditions. Time keeps passing by and I have had a lot of time to pray and reflect AND to discern how I should live and serve Christ in the upcoming New Year. Yes, God definitely raises the spiritual bar each year lest I get too complacent or indifferent. Not just through what works I do in my ministry – but also in all the moments of my daily ordinary life. I am sure God will do so for each of us.

December is usually one of my busy months and here I am being told to slow down! But I realized, now that I am happily back in Divine, that regardless of all the anxiety I felt being alone in a hospital room 3 hours away from everyone I knew in India and the difficulty of communicating in English properly - I felt the Presence and Grace of God closer to me than I ever had experienced before. During the Homily of the Holy Mass celebration the night before I went to the hospital, these words had struck my heart particularly.  The priest preached in a booming voice, “God is saying, ‘You are precious to Me! (Isaiah 43:4) Yes, you! Every tear you have shed has been counted and collected (Psalm 56:8) and every hair on your head I have counted (Matthew 10:30). It is I who formed you in your mother’s womb (Psalm 139:15) and I have a special mission for you on this earth. I am not FINISHED with you!” I seemed to have been ill since early September (for different reasons) and these words brought a hopeful stirring in my heart that night (20 Nov)...that God is not done with me serving Him yet! The next day what I thought was an outpatient appointment unexpectedly became an immediate 6-day hospital stay! I even had to shop for everything I needed after being admitted.

All I could think of was all my pending work and projects and if this meant I should think of moving back where I feel comfortable - with doctors, the medical system I am familiar with and most of all closer to loved ones. For the first time, I was rather anxious of my health which I tend to take for granted. Well, hospitals and needles are way, way down on my favourites list! Hence – the 6 days made me once again to ponder about life. As the minutes ticked by, I realized how important each moment is for me to use it to share whatever graces God is pouring into my life. 

I only had my Bible, my prayer journal, the Way of The Cross Booklet written by Fr. Augustine Vallooran V.C. (Director of this retreat centre I serve in) and the incredibly inspiring business leadership book “The Pope & The CEO” written by Andreas Widmar of what he learnt from Blessed Pope John Paul II which I was reading for the second time. I never felt lonely even for a moment with these books. All the inspiration and courage I needed came through the words written or jotted down in these books. Most of all, I truly realized that with Advent about to begin, I had this GREAT opportunity to prepare for a NEW BEGINNING – a whole new start with the arrival of Jesus – our Emmanuel (God-with-us) this Christmas!

The night before my operation, as I prayed the Way of the Cross, each Station’s reflection made me to once again to look at my own life. The past few Good Fridays in Divine Retreat Centre, I had wept at some of the reflections which brought back deeply buried (and I thought long-forgotten) experiences in my life. Now I knew as I prayed that Jesus was with me then – IS ALWAYS with me - at all times. He would have come down to earth to die – even if it was only to save me – ONE sinner.That is the amazing love of Jesus! I felt so precious; I also felt truly loved as a person. Jesus had shown me the incredibly supportive love of my close friends in Singapore - the JOY Family (I have no words to describe of their prayers and love), my brother - George who being a pharmacist explained the medications and kept daily tabs of my health, Fr. Augustine Vallooran – whose calm, assuring voice took away whatever anxieties I had and who made all the needed arrangements, and other very dear priests in India and friends overseas who called, wrote and prayed so lovingly for me when they heard of my hospitalization.

I guess some of us need sometimes a life-incident to stop us and to experience in our own lives that God loves us- that each of us IS precious as an INDIVIDUAL - and that we are loved by family and friends even if we all live in distant countries. I had chosen not to worry most of my family members just because my immune system had taken an extended holiday and my body was under some stress.

I do not want to waste any more moments in my life when I can share the Grace of God in me with every person God sends into my life. I want this Christmas to be a new beginning in my life for my Saviour. The book “The Pope & The CEO” that I am re-reading slowly and reflecting of Pope John Paul II is truly inspiring about how to live our Catholic faith so that it is a LIVING faith at all times – work, ministry, friends and family life. Well, I may not be leading any teams now but that does not mean my life cannot be an example to others. As followers of Christ, each of us must be a leader to inspire others by our “authentic Christ-centred living”.  I need to make sure that the people in my life feel personally valued and cared for – never ASSUMING that they should know! Pope John Paul II had this amazing gift. It is about always putting people first as Jesus does; nurturing, listening, acknowledging, loving, trusting and building up their talents and skills and their faith. That moment when a person needs my time or attention to experience God’s Grace will never come back again. I might not get another chance to show them they do matter to me. It is not easy but I am determined to try to live as Blessed Pope John Paul II who has always personally inspired me since a youth.  Nothing is impossible for God. Each of us – you and me - can be a “shining light” of Christ’s Love & Joy to others. Compassion, joy, caring, listening, acceptance, acknowledgment, understanding, trust and humility have no material value but infinite “Divine Value” to the person who may need it most from us even without our knowledge. That always touches and convert hearts more than correction, judgments, human logic or rules ever do. If change is needed, I have learnt one sure fact in Divine – TAKE IT UP TO GOD IN PRAYER! He will do the needed or show His Way at the right time.

 So as I meditate in prayer this Holy Season of Advent on the life of Jesus in the Way of The Cross and in my daily bible reflections, I lift up all my loved ones, friends, persons I find difficult to deal with, readers of my blog, my Divine Family, along with my own life to God….that with His Gift of His Precious Son - Jesus our Emmanuel – a new JOYFUL BEGINNING in life awaits each of us this blessed season of Christmas and for the rest of our lives!

I would like to share with you the soul-inspiring YouTube music video below - "AMAZING GRACE (MY CHAINS ARE GONE)" by CHRIS TOMLIN.

May our hearts be prepared anew to receive unconditionally the ultimate Grace of God – our Messiah and King!

“Come, Lord Jesus!” 

(Revelation 22:20)