September 27 is the Feast Day of St. Vincent de Paul who is known as the Patron Saint of all Catholic Charities. St. Vincent is also the Patron Saint of the Vincentian Congregation of India, the priests who run Divine Retreat Centre, Kerala, India where I have been serving for over 16 years.
St. Vincent like many saints we read about had a huge personal conversion of his heart for Jesus. That moment of personal conversion was his inspiration to not only preach the Word of God through popular missions in parishes but also to serve the poor. Like the Samaritan Man, helping the poor was not an option. It was Jesus command to all of us, "Go and do likewise."(Luke 10:37)
The Covid-19 pandemic is a wake-up call to all of us on earth to be kinder and gentler towards one another, and be responsible and caring stewards to all living creatures, to Nature, the environment, waterways, seas, oceans and the ozone layer in the skies. We, humans, through indifference and greed have plundered our earth with little thought to the long-term damage we contribute to. Every life that God created is precious to Him. The Encyclical, LAUDATO SI by Pope Francis has become so meaningful to me. It's subtitle is "Common Care For Our Home". It should be read by every human being and not just Catholics.
With churches around the world closed during the Season of Lent and the greatest Catholic liturgical week, Holy Week, Catholics around the world were stunned and felt lost. A great blessing is that many Catholics have found the beautiful grace to turn to God, and to be rooted in Christ. The churches may be closed but in this difficult times, many Catholics have access to online Catholic resources. It has opened hearts for many of us to understand the Word of God, the Holy Bible with a deeper love for Jesus. Many Catholics all over the world have reached out to help those who are suffering in their communities regardless of race, religion or creed.
Despite great difficulties here in Kerala due to the pandemic, I have found the special grace of God's Mercy upon all of us in Divine Retreat Centre. It is priceless to be able to celebrate daily Holy Mass and to pray in front of the Blessed Sacrament. There is an indescribable peace just sitting at the Feet of Jesus. For this alone, I am so thankful to God that I am here.
Fr. Michael Payyapilly V.C.'s homily-"WHAT IS MY ONGOING CONVERSION STORY?",in the YouTube video at the top of this post, penetrated my heart. In fact, I could identify fully with St. Vincent de Paul before his conversion story. Like him, I was only focused on my career, job position and the financial benefits I could attain. Like St. Vincent, I was obsessed with the comforts in life. It was all about being a success materially on earth.
On Palm Sunday 2020, I found a deep inner peace fill my heart, mind and soul. I had opened up to the Director that I was sitting in front of him not as a volunteer but as a broken person. I was feeling very fragile and fearful for all my family members. I could not help anyone! My ministry which is mainly overseas-based literally came to a standstill. When I was prayed over, I had the sensation of a huge boulder of heavy weight being lifted up from my shoulders. In that blessed moment, my heart was completely free from personal pains and inner wounds. Yes, even in ministry, we do go through all these - where we are exhausted, burdened and joy seems to be elusive.
As I look back now, it was solely due to the prayers of some very dear family and friends, I am now able to have quality reflective time to do intercessory prayers for all who ask me, and in spiritual readings and videos. The Word of God lift us up when we learn to totally surrender our lives unto Jesus' Hands. My favourite novena is the Novena of Surrender. It had no effect on me when I started praying this novena in late January for four consecutive cycles. Then I noticed a change in my heart and mind. The few strained relationships I had here were healed and we are all on good terms as friends. We even have our meals together and pray for each other. There is laughter and joy where before we tried to keep our distance if we could.
How did it happen? It is about remembering my personal conversion story and the love that seemed to burst from my heart for Jesus. All I needed and wanted was to live for Jesus! Nothing else mattered. Yet as the years went by, my personal conversion experience seemed to take a backseat in the midst of ministry. It is like a spiritual burnout. This pandemic has given me the much-needed opportunity to deeply root myself in Christ as I write and recall my ongoing faith journey over the years since my 1st Divine retreat experience. I can clearly identify God's Hand upon my life.
Fr. Michael in his homily challenges each of us to reflect on this heart-piercing question, "In my growth stage, have I forgotten my ongoing conversion story?" Father further reminded us we should not have growth for the sake of growth. Our faith journey is always an ongoing conversion story.
Only then can my conversion story be my GREATEST love story. Jesus, I love You with All of me. Only in You, I find Joy and Strength to be detached from this world and to be deeply rooted in You - my source of Life, my Hope, my Love.
The YouTube music video below, LOVELY LORD by PETRA is the prayer I have in my heart every day now. The year 2020 is indeed life-changing - I have rediscovered the love and passion to live for Jesus with all my being. My family and I have grown closer to each other as we have all turned to God praying for each other and with each other through Zoom. We have never been closer as a family despite the oceans that separate us. In the meantime, there is much love and joy living here in Divine Retreat Centre. It is the family Jesus has gifted me for the past 16 years in India.
"Lovely Lord, I am longing to see You one day face to face."
"HOLY MOTHER" by Eric Clapton and Luciano Pavarotti
Today is Easter Sunday 2020. An Easter that will never be forgotten for a long time to come. All the churches across the world are silent and empty. However, our hearts which is a "temple of God" is not empty. In a mysterious way, this Holy Week and Easter has drawn us very much closer to Jesus, our Redeemer. All Glory and Praise to God! Easter is all about Hope!
In this pandemic, along with the
fear and despair, many of us have realized how important our Christian faith is
in our lives. Despite it all, we have
experienced interior joy and a deep soul-searching of what should be most
important in our journey here on earth, Yes, it is not the material
things in life. Where are we in our spiritual life? Are we ready for our
eternal life in heaven? Have we been good stewards of the earth as per one of
the readings during the Easter Vigil mass where God made man the master of all
the living animals and plants on land and sea. Each one of us as human beings,
have failed in this aspect - towards our fellow human beings and to all of
Creation.
Video
Credit: Guardian UK
Through social media, we have
seen air and sea pollution clear up so much, that Mount Everest can be seen
clearly miles away in North India. We see dolphins swimming and frolicking in
waters from Venice in Italy to Cochin, India; a herd of Great Orme mountain
goats coming down from the mountains in North Wales; a critically endangered
wild civet cat calmly walking the streets of a town in Kerala, India. In fact,
today I saw video of a monkey taking a dive from the outside of a condo a
few floors up into the swimming pool and then swimming leisurely across
the pool. It was amazing! But it brought a serious question and resolve
within my heart - to be a much better human being. I know I can live with a lot
less materially and to focus on what should be important - life on earth is
temporary. We are pilgrims and our home is Heaven. I need to be more socially
and ethically responsible to be a a better steward while on earth.
This Holy Easter, let us rejoice
in Jesus who has won Eternal Life for all of humankind. Let us proclaim and
live the Victory of the Cross - Jesus our Redeemer.
I received the beautiful YouTube video at the top of the post from
my sister in USA a short while ago - "Holy Mother" by Eric Clapton and Luciano Pavarotti.
It is the first time I have seen this music video. When Eric Clapton started
singing, I felt teary and the moment Luciano Pavarotti started singing until
the end, I had painful goosebumps and a great joy well up within my
heart. It made me realize tangibly how the entire Holy Week was about
Jesus' greatest gift to us - His Life AND it was also about Mother Mary, our
Holy Mother. Her courage, her faith and her total acceptance of God's Will is
the shining example to each of us. She was a human being just like you and me.
We need to strive to be a "missionary" like Mother Mary - not by
being famous and rich and having human power. It is in quiet humility, striving
to be totally faithful and courageous to do God's Will at all times. Mother
Mary lead us to live for Jesus with joy and hope! This music video is the
inspiration of my Easter 2020 post.
Here is a short prayer to St. Philip Neri, known as the Patron Saint of Joy and
Apostle
of Rome, who
was a priest, missionary and founder of the Congregation
of the
Oratory that can help a soul weighed down by the anxieties of the
world
“The
Christian ‘identity card,'” Pope Francis underscored, “is joy, the Gospel’s
joy, the joy of having been chosen by Jesus, saved by Jesus, regenerated by
Jesus; the joy of that hope that Jesus is waiting for us, the joy that – even
with the crosses and sufferings we bear in this life – is expressed in another
way, which is peace in the certainty that Jesus accompanies us, is
with us.”
Fr
Michael Payyapilly V.C., Parish Priest of Holy Family Church, Doveton, Australia leads us in into a
soul-searching and anointed Divine Mercy Stations of the Cross YouTube video above. In this Holy
Season of Lent when the world is in a great coronavirus (COVID-19) crisis and
most churches and borders worldwide closed in countrywide lock-down, our hearts need to turn to God for mercy and hope. Many
of us are living in nationwide lock-down. It is not easy to do so. Our world as
we know it, has come to a standstill. Thousands have died alone and away from
loved ones due to this swift pandemic.
The
medical frontliners, first responders, and all essential services are working tirelessly to keep the rest of us safe. During this time, let us in this holy Lenten season, make a
deep meaningful soul-searching of what is truly important in our lives.
Families
and loved ones are now having meals and meaningful conversations while bonding together. There is
a break from the rat race as people are working from home. Pollution is
clearing; animals are freely walking on the streets and swimming joyfully in the
waters. I have seen videos of geese, dolphins frolicking in the Indian
harbours and even a very endangered animal walking on an empty street in
India.
Personally, I took the time to really enjoy a heavy downpour a few days ago, feeling the breeze in my face, the leaves on the trees looking so refreshed with the raindrops on them, and the sound of the raindrops on the ground. I felt so free and the tensions of being cooped up went away that morning
We
have to accept whatever it takes. Makes everyone ponder about the meaning of
our lives. We are often too self-absorbed. Looking at the sudden totally
unexpected downpour that morning, I actually marvelled about how God brings
about the weather changes in our daily lives. It had been so hot and the rain really made me happy
especially the cool breeze. (I enjoy rains except the type that brings floods!)
Rains
are a blessing for humankind, oceans, waterfalls, environment, animals and
plants. Yet, I have seldom taken few moments to offer thanks and be grateful to
God
I
decided to start a Gratitude Daily Journal and every morning, afternoon and
night, I looked at what had brought me joy - despite being alone in my own
company. Things in life i take for granted. Just simple moments in life like waking up at 5.10 a.m. in the
morning, alive and well. I am definitely not a morning person!
It
is not easy for me. Yesterday, I cried three times as I could not take it being
in lock-down for so long since 15 March and extended until late April.. However,
I am praying and working on some ideas I have had for a few years but I seem to
have never had the time! In this time of great solitude and reflection, life seems to be in a standstill, I am
very aware of Jesus' Presence in my life and the things that clutter my life which needs to discarded - physically, mentally and emotionally.
Joining
the live-streaming of the touching Divine Mercy Stations of the Cross by Fr. Michael Payyapilly V.C.
at the top of the post today, I felt the tension in my heart and mind loosening its
grip. It made me realize yet again how much my family and friends mean to me. It is never
easy being away from them - something I realized during the Kerala 2018 floods.
I have had to cancel my Singapore and Australia trips to be with two of my sisters.
I was rather sadas I was really looking forward to be with family.
However, I am happy that all my family and loved ones have been safe so far. We
have all found strength in our faith as have many millions of Catholics
around the world.
It has taught many of us never to take the daily Holy Eucharist for
granted. It has made us realize how much our priests mean to us, "shepherds of the flock" here on earth are so integral in all the important events of our lives. We
should pray for our priests every day so that all of us are sustained
spiritually, as we are pilgrims on earth. God has sent them to guide us to heaven, our eternal home.
In
the stress of the lock-down, nationwide in many countries, it is good to look at our
lives and once again find joy in the simple priceless treasures we have taken
for granted.
Treasure our families and loved ones - always nurture our relationships! Strengthen the personal touch in our lives. Stop being attached to our mobiles and electronic gadgets. Never take anyone or any aspect of our life for granted. Our life is God's gift to us.
Most of all, we have to realize that the earth is not just for us human beings. How we have ignored, nature and the animals, all
living creatures, the fauna and flora! They are springing to new life. Pollution and waters have cleaned up. It is wake-up time for each of us to learn to live in this world equitably with all of
God's Creation.
Today, besides my loved ones, I take this moment to thank God for all the priests in the world who are reaching out to us through social media. So that our souls continue to be nourished and fed. We are not alone.
I take this opportunity to thank Fr. Michael Payyapilly for once again touching our hearts to reach out to Jesus' Mercy and to live in love and hope.
Let us all live in this world with love, compassion and kindness!
